How to Get Rid of Your Ex-Husband - Psychology Will Help. Question for a system-vector psychologist. how to get rid of your ex-husband: we only dream of a breakup How to get rid of your ex-husband forever reviews
There are different situations in life. Sometimes the closest and most beloved people hurt you so much that thoughts arise to annoy you and teach you a lesson. There are many ways to take revenge on your ex-husband. The noblest one is to become happy, indifferent. There are also more sophisticated options, for example, to publicly humiliate, cuckold, scare, or punish using magic. Detailed description, recipes for revenge, see below.
To be or not to be, that is the question
Before taking action, all women have doubts to one degree or another. Is it worth taking revenge, or do you still need to let go of the situation and move on with your life. It all depends on the person and the situation, the action that the ex committed.
In some cases, it's really better to just forget. The thirst for revenge is a negative and very insidious feeling. On the one hand, revenge seems to be an act of justice and self-defense, but on the other hand, it deprives a person of reason, adequacy and can lead to sad consequences.
To understand whether it is worth taking revenge on your ex-spouse, honestly answer the following questions:
You need to be especially careful if you and your husband have children together. If revenge negatively affects the child’s communication with his father, then, as he grows up, he may blame you.
Top 5 ways to take revenge
Offended women are terrible destructive force. When they come together, there is no limit to their creativity. Let's list best ways take more painful revenge on your ex-husband, described on the forum:
Taking revenge beautifully is a whole science. Try to use your imagination, carefully work out the plan. Anticipate all the unexpected things you will say if you are discovered.
How to take revenge on your husband for infidelity and betrayal
The news of betrayal is a serious blow for a woman. Especially when the husband dared to betray after 10-20-30 years of marriage, there are joint children and acquired property. Then breaking up and kicking out the traitor is three times more difficult. What to do then? How to make your spouse feel guilty? It is necessary to punish him, but in a cunning way, with dignity and cold reason. So, how to take revenge on your ex-husband for betrayal:
In fact, according to statistics, every 3 families who have been married for 10 years or more go through infidelity. If it happened only once, and the spouse sincerely repents of it, it is worth trying to forgive. To make it easier, revenge will not help; here you need actions from your husband that prove sincere feelings.
How to take revenge on your husband for drinking
Perhaps the most ambiguous situation. On the one hand, whoever it happens to, well, the person relaxed and drank. He has every right to do this. Sometimes rest is simply necessary. On the other hand, if drinking ruined important plans or the husband drinks regularly, this is very unpleasant.
In fact, drunkenness is either bad habit or illness (alcoholism). Its root is purely psychological. Neither swearing, nor humiliation, nor even a return party with friends will help here. There is another, more effective way to teach a drinker a lesson:
- Don't react. Meet your spouse calmly and don't show it. Try to do something enjoyable.
- Don't help your husband cope with a hangover. His condition is his responsibility.
- Entrust him with an important task. For example, skimp on the list, nail a shelf, dig up a garden.
- Don't accept objections. Say that you understand that he wanted to drink, but no one canceled the housework. Next time, let him think in advance about how difficult it will feel.
Another way to teach a lesson for drinking is to make your hangover worse. To do this, it is enough to give your husband a decoction of wormwood or coffin root (1-2 tablespoons). Indigestion should be dismissed: “Well, I’ve finished drinking, and I’m not far from a stomach ulcer!” The main thing is not to overdo it with the dosage, and not to use the method for chronic diseases.
How to take revenge on your husband for insults
Insulting a woman, and especially his wife, is very low. Any normal man understands this. If the spouse was able to step over this line, it means that he was either not raised from the beginning, or was wounded to the core. It is quite possible that you gave a reason. However, it is definitely not worth tolerating humiliation. The offender needs to be shamed.
You can do this verbally, explaining that such behavior is unworthy of a man. If explanations do not work, people who are authoritative for the husband should be involved in the problem - relatives, friends, someone else. It would be nice to record a video of his unpleasant behavior so that he can look at himself from the outside.
And finally, the most desperate measures are to respond in kind. The most painful thing for a man is public humiliation, a scandal at work or among friends, ridicule of his shortcomings. But be prepared for an answer, the defensive reaction can be very harsh.
Revenge for beatings
But taking revenge for physical injuries is highly discouraged. A man who is able to raise his hand to a woman can go very far. Here you need to act with the support of the law.
Write a statement against your spouse and remove the beatings. It is advisable to collect other evidence of aggression - write down threats, attract witnesses. The main thing is, don’t flatter yourself with hope, such a person will not change.
Revenge for betrayal using magic
The magical method of revenge is very popular among women. To do this, it is not at all necessary to look for a professional fortune teller or witch. Eat simple conspiracies that everyone can use. Let's describe the two most effective:
You cannot tell anyone about the rituals performed. The secret will need to be kept for the rest of your life, otherwise you will have to answer for the magic with hardships and troubles.
The pain of betrayal is one of the most powerful. In such cases, a woman almost always becomes depressed, her self-esteem drops, her mood becomes unstable and tearful. However, revenge is not the answer. It will only give temporary relief, but will not correct the situation.
To feel better, you need to start working on yourself. Change externally and internally, love yourself again. Sometimes it is even advisable to seek the help of a professional psychologist and take antidepressants. The reward for this is a happy future, new love and family. And of course, biting your ex’s elbows.
An insult always evokes a desire to take revenge on the traitor. Some people actually feel better after revenge. However, more often it completely separates people and makes them bitter towards each other. Therefore, before taking action, you should think seriously. Moreover, there are always two people to blame in a situation.
Marina, Rostov
You’ve already forgotten when you not only kissed, but also talked normally. The divorce stamp officially confirms that you are strangers. And it’s like he’s hitting the wall with peas - instead of a comma, he again puts a nervous, exhausting comma. And threatens: “I"ll be back...”
And tomorrow the same thing again - he comes to the child and sorts things out in the kitchen, in the morning he leaves an armful of roses at the door, and in the evening he knocks down the same door with his brave shoulder, tearfully begs the boss to influence you and tracks down your location using a mobile signal. It’s worse if it’s not possible to separate, then every delay at work blows up the apartment with a hysterical scene of jealousy with insults and threats.
How to get rid of this?
Types of Stalkers
You will be surprised, but psychologists distinguish between an adequate pursuer and an inadequate one. We will return to the pathological type later, but for now let’s see what keeps a mentally normal man near a woman who long ago and clearly said: “Farewell forever!”
Adequate
A man is acutely aware of competition and a woman’s high assessment of his merits is extremely important to him. And an abandoned man, naturally, understands that somewhere and in some way he did not satisfy the woman and another – better one – will soon take his place. It’s hard for a man’s pride to bear this. Well, a woman cannot choose loneliness or, even worse, anyone else over him - such a handsome man in all respects. And if a woman, out of little intelligence, also points out shortcomings during a breakup, a man may be inflamed with a desire to prove that he is still the most macho macho and an enviable groom. And all the artillery of the candy-bouquet period is used, right down to exquisite sex, so that this bitch will regret her words and ask to come back. This would be a balm for the wounds of wounded pride. And this is often what happens - a woman, naively stunned by her worth and the power of love that she is able to evoke, returns the suitor to his place. Until next time.
The result of provocation. We, women, are not sinless either. A year has passed since the breakup, and we are all savoring with our girlfriends the details of the last conversation and his request to return. And if the thought is material, then the spoken word, even more so, attracts the ex and does not let go. He may be glad to leave without looking back, but then what will his ex brag about if the thought that a man cannot forget her, like a fire warms her on cold winter evenings. And there will always be firewood for heating - the struggle for the redistribution of spoons, the investigation of the crimes of the former mother-in-law, and even asking for help in driving a nail through an old friendship. And the confrontation with your ex can last forever.
I realized the mistake. Believing that the woman will not go anywhere, the man often sits on his head. And when he is overthrown from there, at first he is offended, and then he realizes that this woman is the best thing that could happen to him in this life. And, like Adam, who had eaten too many apples, he tries to regain his lost paradise. But in reality, such a situation happens extremely rarely, and even more rarely Adam receives forgiveness, because an intelligent woman understands - let the goat into the garden and everything will repeat all over again.
Inadequate
The degree of adequacy of a person is measured by the number of “No” said by a woman. The maximum is three times. And then - the more, the deeper the pathology. And the harder the battle will be not only for freedom, but also for your own safety.
Dog in the manger - a woman in love is ready for anything for her beloved, who takes her love for granted, takes advantage of her weaknesses and looks indifferently at problems and experiences. But as soon as the woman decides to change places and leave the ungrateful man, he immediately turns into an ardent lover. He urgently needs to return her love, since he feeds on her and will die without her. Romantic? Yes. On distance. But I somehow don’t want to see myself in the role of a silent and powerless feeder. Therefore, a firm “No” and a new fan flexing his biceps will do the trick, especially since that subspecies is relatively harmless.
Abandoned child. Abandoned by a busy mother, a little boy until his old age will retain a strong desire to cling to a warm female breast and the fear of losing another mother - his wife. Having met a young girl, tailored in the image and likeness of her mother, he immediately rushes with her to the registry office. And then either the woman gets tired of the infantilism of her husband-child, or the adult child annoys her with jealousy and self-centeredness, for which she gets turned away. And again, the little boy is experiencing trauma and passionately wants to return his mother or at least be close to her - even on the bedside rug, and it doesn’t matter that there is already a new husband in the bed. Do not be alarmed by threats of suicide - a self-centered type will never do anything bad to himself. But it’s easy to manipulate you. I feel very sorry for such a man, but if you don’t want to be his vest all your life, kindly but firmly stand your ground. Well, just like with a child. Moreover, he needs you not as a woman, but as an imitation of his mother. This is the only way he can experience the most vivid emotions in his life.
Maniac
– this is not just a type. This is a diagnosis. It even has a name - “narcissistic perversion”. He needs a victim whose life he will ruin. This is his happiness and the meaning of life. He can give roses and whip you with them. He can hit you so that you feel how painful it was for him. And the most extreme case is sung in a romantic song from Soviet times:
Natasha, Natasha, if a miracle happened
And if you suddenly became ugly
And maybe then you might notice
That I am next to you alone in the whole world.
And if for this a woman needs to be beaten until she loses her kidneys, doused with acid or further according to the Criminal Code, he will not stop. After all, relationships are built on the principle “So don’t let anyone get you!” And if at the beginning of a relationship a woman considered hysterical jealousy a sign of great love, then at the stage of separation her eyes open.
What to do and where to go?
The most interesting thing is that you need to influence not only the pursuer, but also yourself. Surely your victorious behavior is largely to blame - the aggressor needs a victim and he finds it in you. It is in you, and not in your tough and calculating friend. Change - and the pursuit will lose its meaning for him.
What to do to the stalker?
The last conversation should be kept in a calm, even friendly tone. Talk about your relationship only in the past tense, thank him for all the good things that happened between you, but emphasize that everything has passed and there can be no return. Whatever you do, don’t ask for forgiveness, don’t show weakness. He should not hear a note of doubt - do not give him any reason or hope. Assure yourself first of all and it will be easier to assure him - life consists of periods and your period together has already passed. Another one begins.
Your ex-man has the right to feel and worry. And you must respect this right. But you are not to blame for anything before him. These are his feelings, and you didn't do anything to hurt him on purpose.
Close this situation and don’t relive it over and over again in conversations with your girlfriends, sleepless nights or looking for a reason to reproach him for something again. If you are not indifferent to this topic, then the question is who is persecuting whom.
Depending on his financial situation - intrusively ask to lend you a large sum of money or, on the contrary, lend it to him , if you know that he won’t give it back. Maybe an unrepaid debt will keep him from showing his face to you. Consider yourself paid off.
If it doesn’t help, agree to marry him. And turn into a mercantile person – you will need a ring with the most incredible diamond, a couture dress, a banquet with the participation of all second cousins in the most fashionable restaurant in the city, and a foreign one. Honeymoon on the Cote d'Azur after signing a marriage contract with the division of his property in your favor. This is followed by renunciation of housekeeping, and at the same time renunciation of marital debt. If he does agree, you’re really getting married, why waste personnel?
If you don’t decide on this option, then sacrifice your unearthly beauty and charisma, temporarily, of course. An inadequate pursuer, as befits a maniac, has problems with mental flexibility. You are a symbol for him. Change, become simpler, get off the pedestal - cut the ground from under the feet of his fantasies and illusions.
At repeated meetings it is necessary to minimize communication time and expended emotions . Stop all conversations that have long been overdone, citing lack of time. Do not allow yourself to be drawn into emotional squabbles - their time has passed.
At the slightest violation of your personal space, freedom of movement, or damage to property, attract witnesses and the police. Usually persecutors who lead a completely respectable external life are afraid of publicity. Threaten human rights activists to intervene. But only once. Threats should not be empty - after the first time, write an official document. Two papers is already a systematic offense. The accumulated amount of evidence will help you when trial, to which things could easily come. Sometimes staying alive after such a relationship is already great luck.
The persecutor, who can only torment the defenseless, often hides in front of relatives or friends of strong physique and determined ones. Therefore, enlist their support.
Take self-defense courses, Carry an authorized weapon, a stun gun. Remember that in the hands of a determined woman, not only a frying pan can become a weapon, but also a ballpoint pen stuck in the palm, a high heel stepped on the foot and a manicure left in the eyes. Remember that your life is worth more than maintaining external decency.
True love, even after a long time, generates joy and pushes people to beautiful, noble deeds. It makes people happy – both at once and exponentially. But this will never happen in your life while the painful past tenaciously and cowardly holds you with its trembling hands. Get rid of it. Make room for the future.
The problem is familiar. Tired of your ex-husband? He doesn’t react at all to the fact that we don’t want to see him anymore, that it’s disgusting to see him. Time after time he keeps watch, offering more and more new options. But you just don’t need it. What to do? How to find peace? Of course, you can contact the police, but you are unlikely to achieve the desired effect. The maximum that they will do there is to conduct a preventive conversation, which, most likely, will act on your “beloved” like a red rag on a bull. After which the number of unpleasant actions in his performance will probably increase. So how to get rid of your ex-husband (lover)?
First of all, you need to start acting on your own. It’s better to talk to a person and explain everything. It’s just that the circumstances for the conversation must be chosen wisely. It will be better if this does not happen during a chance meeting, when he lies in wait for you again. Take the initiative yourself, call and make an appointment at a cafe. Believe me, he won’t refuse, and he probably won’t ask what the conversation will be about. Ask to come sober if this problem is urgent. Rest assured, this will happen.
You should not start the meeting with the fact that you are breaking up. Try to explain what is happening in your life. Tell them that the situation is also unpleasant for you and that you are experiencing it with difficulty. No matter how disgusting you are, treat your interlocutor as a person, and not as an “animal”. Give hope that if the situation suddenly changes, you will immediately let them know, but these pesterings do not cause anything in you except “antipathy” and rejection. Explain that if you don't see him for a while, then maybe everything will change and come back. Convince the person that during this time you will not look for a replacement for him and you are worried about what is happening, and now there is simply no time for that. During the conversation, refrain from insults, as they will become additional verbal barriers or an incentive for his aggressive actions.
In no case during the conversation should you mention a new relationship, how good it is for you, that you have just started living, etc. If you hurt a person more, his brakes will completely fail.
You should not refuse the offer to walk you home. Specify in advance that only up to the entrance. Remember that the purpose of the meeting is to give the person hope for the future. Perhaps in a week he will forget who you are and what your name is, or he will wait for you for a year. But you will get a certain respite, you will be able to move him away to a certain distance. During this time, he will be able to calm down, his emotional involvement will weaken, and his hunting excitement will subside. And you will be able to find the long-awaited peace.
If there are no relatives, ask close friends for permission to temporarily stay with them until the situation is clarified. Do not start litigation regarding the division of property if the spouse refuses to resolve the problem peacefully, thereby trying to take revenge. It takes some time for the person to realize what happened, and then you could part ways peacefully. How to get rid of ex-boyfriend Getting rid of your ex-lover, with whom you did not have time to start a family, is much easier. For this, sometimes it is enough for one of your acquaintances to play the role of your new boyfriend. Advice: If the guy still doesn’t lag behind and continues to annoy you with visits, phone calls and messages, do not be fooled by provocation. By reacting to these actions, you thereby give the annoying boyfriend a reason to continue acting in the same spirit.
Strength of spirit: how to get rid of your ex-husband
Advice: If you decide to break up with your partner, do not fall for his tricks and forget about sympathy. A person will not change, and the feeling of pity will deprive him of the opportunity for personal happiness.2.
A sense of ownership. It is also based on pride. The spouse or boyfriend believes that he has certain rights over his ex.
The man is convinced that his ex-passion can only belong to him and no one else, even if he has no feelings for her. 3. Awakened feelings. After a husband or boyfriend hears that they are leaving him, he suddenly has an “epiphany.”
The man begins to realize that he has lost the love of his life and rushes to reanimate the relationship. 4. Fear of being alone.
How to get rid of your ex-husband's stalking
How to get rid of an ex-boyfriend or husband painlessly Not every girl or woman decides to directly tell her companion that their paths will soon diverge. Little feminine tricks will help you get rid of your ex-husband or boyfriend painlessly.
Advice: Make a man’s life hell by depriving him of his personal space. Start annoying with regular calls when your husband or boyfriend is at work or busy with important matters.
Throw a tantrum if he doesn't answer the phone right away. After your partner returns home, do not leave his side for a minute and take his phone.
A man must understand that he is under constant control. Not everyone is able to tolerate such antics, since every person wants to feel to some extent independent and free.
Advice: Deprive a man of home comfort and intimacy.
But if this is exactly your case, think for yourself, is it worth being so adamant if you were not satisfied only with a temporary cooling of feelings, his inattention and lack of romance? With another man, sooner or later you will come to the same point, so is it worth it now to break off ties with a person whose sincerity of love you now do not doubt? If you have firmly decided that you will not let him into your life again, write a short letter in which you explain your position: “I don’t love you.” Any explanations will give him a reason to get hooked and promise to improve.
Do you need extra worries? If you yourself unwittingly provoke him, regularly reminding him of yourself, causing scandals during meetings, then it is enough to remove the irritant - you, in fact, from his field of vision, and he himself will disappear from your life.
Methods for getting rid of your ex-husband's terror
Important
Why does the ex-husband harass his ex-wife? There may be several options: Only after the divorce did he realize that he had lost By the way, this happens quite often: after leaving his annoying wife, a man after a while realizes that he misses her and that he really misses her, and he’s tired of looking after himself . So the ex-husband makes attempts to revive the relationship.
A sense of ownership has awakened in the man. Men are big owners and jealous. It often happens that a man, having learned that his ex-wife has someone else, begins to be furiously jealous and tries to do everything to prevent her from organizing her personal life. It should be noted that such behavior of ex-husbands is much more often related to hurt pride than to love.
How to get rid of your ex-husband - psychology will help
But often exes continue to sort things out, which can drag on for a long time and will not lead to anything good. After you have told your husband or boyfriend that there can be nothing more in common between you, cut off all points of contact between you.
Remember: By continuing communication, you give the person hope for a future relationship. How to get rid of your ex-husband if you have common property or children If you have common property or children, it will be quite difficult to get rid of your ex right away.
The husband or partner will have an excuse to come again and again, under the guise of wanting to be with the child. Having shared housing, the situation becomes doubly complicated: the partner may declare that he does not intend to leave anywhere at all.
How to get rid of your ex in this case? Advice: Pack your things and go live with your relatives.
Ex-husband threatens what to do
Despite the fact that men are considered the stronger sex, they also have common human weaknesses. You have been together for more than a year, and maybe even more than a dozen years.
Attention
During this time, a certain, established model of relationships develops in the partner’s head. Personal relationships become an integral part of his own self.
He does not want to make any changes to this model, since men are characterized by constancy. A partner may have several mistresses, but will never dare to take a step away from his own wife, in which he sees support.
He is afraid of losing this support, and therefore will try with all his might to hold on to his companion. 5. Desire for revenge. An abandoned husband, a guy decides to ruin the life of his passion, annoying her with harassment, threats or even assault. By doing this, he is trying to express how painful it is for him, and he wants you to experience it yourself.
How to get rid of your ex-spouse, friend, lover once and for all
Some men, having divorced their spouse, inexplicably believe that she should continue to be faithful to them and remain single, while they have every right to date other women. “We didn’t even have time to get a divorce, how did you find someone else?! I didn’t expect it from you!” the ex-husband-owner often tells his ex-wife. What else could he expect? A man has mental problems If a man, having divorced a woman, pursues her for years, using either pleas or threats, we can assume that he has obvious psychological problems and needs the help of an experienced psychologist, or even a psychiatrist.
Get rid of attacks from your ex-husband in this case pretty hard.
How to get rid of your ex-husband?
But if a woman no longer wants to see her husband, with whom she broke up, but wants to start new life with a new relationship, then terror ex-spouse can greatly complicate her life and even lead to health problems, both mental and physical. What makes an ex-husband pester his ex-wife? 1.
After living alone for some time, a man begins to understand how good he had with his ex-wife. He realizes that he misses her care and courtship, which he had not noticed before. Therefore, he begins attempts at reconciliation. 2. Often a man, having learned that he has ex-wife a lover has appeared with whom she is happy in all aspects of the relationship, and begins to show unbridled jealousy, especially if his relationship with the opposite sex does not work out. He will try in every way to harm the happiness of these two people.
The man should get the impression that it is he who is leaving you, and not you leaving him. How to get rid of your ex-boyfriend, husband: drastic methods If none of the methods helps, you should resort to drastic solutions to the problem.
Advice: Warn your ex that you will be forced to contact the police if he does not stop his harassment. You can threaten to tell all your mutual friends about his indecent behavior or complain to his boss at work.
For men for whom reputation and career matter great importance, this method has a sobering effect. If verbal explanations do not help, proceed to implement what was said: write a statement to the police, ask friends for help, explaining the situation. The man will clearly not like such actions on your part, and he may stop the pursuit.